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Saturday, January 22, 2011

THE STORY OF MY DEATH

This had become just like a ritual for  me....devotion always had a very prominent place in my heart...
....I wasn't  a god fearing person....in fact I loved god...


This year too, I decided to visit sabarimala.
My decision to make my 18th pilgrimage to sabarimala on makarasankrathi was perhaps a coincidence..
It was the first time that I am going to witness the 'wonder'..and the feeling was completely different. Devotion, excitement , adventure....every thing rained into me..

There exists many contradictions against the mystery of occurrence of Makara Jyothi..they say it all..

Numerous reasons..but I find it very difficult to decide between rationalism and devotion.

However it was completely a different experience when I witnessed everything...a sense of completeness...the belief that the almighty does exist...

It had answered my question..perhaps the question which remains unanswered in the hearts of many a souls on this earth...

DOES GOD EXIST??

Many have their own reasons to justify the existence of the super power ,,but today my eyes answered them all..I was almost immersed in the truth..and forgot all the other worldly existence..It was completely different ,,,an aura of purity and holiness


The extra security and force on the proper path to sabarimala caused many a discomfort for the devotees..and hence to avoid the danger of stampede we preferred the other way..the way through pullumedu.


It was my journey back home..much eager to share my experience with my family
This time there was a feeling of  completeness in me

There were many happy faces around me...right from the 5 year old to the 70 year old.


It all began with a road accident..perhaps the reason is still not clear for the government .. may be the clarity is dim because of the closed eyes of irresponsibility..

All that I remember is just a hush bush caused by many a people running across..disturbing the serene atmosphere..
the air that echoed Swami Saranam was now filled with cries of helplessness..

Perhaps many had experienced the unexpected...and then after a minute of complete darkness....I opened my eyes...I could see an auto besides a jeep..both crushed ...only to result in many black and saffron torn clothes ...very difficult to recognise human body amidst the crap...

I tried lifting myself ...all that I wanted was to escape from this disastrous place...run away to a  peaceful place...so that I could prove myself that it was just a bad night mare...and I am going to wake from my sleep in a minute or so...
but truth was something else...I was completely destroyed when I realised that my body is almost paralysed ..and ...

AM I DYING...??

I saw them all...the 5 year old with whom I shared this journey...the old woman who explained me the significance of devotion and belief..

An hour ago...I hardly thought about my lifespan...In fact I was busy searching excuses to explain to my boss for the extended leave..I just cared about the family..my job ..my journey..but never ever imagined it to be the last journey of my life..

Far from my loved ones...the only thing that remains is the desire to meet them once..but helpless ...

My body is lying here in the debris along with many a devotees...now this is somewhere all the gaps are bridged..no caste..no religion..no one even asks you about the colour of your ration card when you are at the gates of death...every creature is equal in the eyes of death

I wish my death no more remains a unanswered case like many other accidents...I wish they sort out the reason for this stampede...

I wish they don't price the value of my life...in lakhs or thousands.,...

I wish no more devotee ever fear to visit sabarimala..for silly security reasons..

I wish they show more interest in the investigation of the accident,...and not in the reality of makara jyothi..

but can the DEAD wish...??

I WISH I WASN'T DEAD...







10 comments:

  1. Hi Madrasi,I liked the way you expressed the views of the common man in the form of your own experience.I could imagine the scene there.Actually another fellow blogger had written a lot of posts regarding this issue and the facts of makara jyoti.I really feel when things are proved about makara jyoti ,people should stop gathering the same day,an awreness should be created.They could rather go other days for darshan.

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  2. In bw..pretty picture of your's :)

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  3. @ramesh: thanks a lot...

    @raji: thanks a lot raji.....
    Infact religion and devotion are very sensitive topics in our country and hence
    creating awareness is rather a very difficult task

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  4. hey......awesome!!!!!!!
    how u make blog.........mam!!111
    just jokin...
    edi but do ans the questun!!!!!!1

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  5. http://thoughtthoughtless.blogspot.com/

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  6. not bad.. i marked interesting and you have scope for improvement! good work!

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  7. Very very touching post. Your profile says you are a student but this post shows writing of a mature, intelligent and experience author. I am sure your parents are proud you.

    What is your name? I would not like to call 'Madrasi'. My reason, I used to live in Delhi before coming to the USA. In Delhi, we used to call everyone from south of MP 'Madrasi' i.e. person from Madras/Tamilnadu. But now I know it better. May be I will call you TM but it is very difficult for me to call you 'Madrasi' because we used this word for difficult people in Delhi.

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  8. Following you now. You may want to do the same if you like my blog.

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  9. @jinu: just keep following my blog...u will become a blogger one day...atleast this is what i can do for my dearest childhood friend

    @shazia: thanks a ton!

    @A:Thanks a lot for your encouraging comments!

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